[Homework] My AP World History Exam is coming up, and I'm lost on how to go about an essay for it on Han China and Maurya India

by Not_Nigerian_Prince

So our essay questions is to compare and contrast the political institutions in these two states, and I have no clue how to really go about this or what to say. Usually for history test essays I organize it in a five paragraph style, with a simple thesis but I'm not sure what mine should SAY. Here's what I have so far:

Thesis: The two states shared a similar governmental structure, bureaucracy, and internal/external policy, but despite these similarities differences in philosophical and social outlook caused these aspects of political institutions to widely diverge.

Things I talk about:

Same: -Gov: Absolute rule, Decentralized 'federations' -Bureaucracy: Scholarly class administration, advanced bureacracy performing public works, influenced by philosophical traditions, codified laws (Ashoka's edicts and Legalist influenced Confucianism) -Internal/External policy: Relative decentralization due to diversity, use of regional princes and vassals, powerful militaries.

Diff: -Gov: Han China was more homogenized, Maurya was more tolerant of other beliefs. -Bureaucracy: Meritocracy in Han China -Internal/External policies: Maurya played major international role, Han are isolationist (due to lower position of merchants). Maurya engaged in diplomatic maneuvering to 'annex' territory, Han relied on outright conquest.

The problems I have right now are a lack of things to say about the government in similarities and differences, differences in bureaucracy, and similarities in policy. I'm also not sure this is the best way of comparing political institutions. Any help available?

Vampire_Seraphin

Thesis: The two states shared a similar governmental structure, bureaucracy, and internal/external policy, but despite these similarities differences in philosophical and social outlook caused these aspects of political institutions to widely diverge.

This is a long winded way of contradicting yourself. You say they are the same but different in the same sentence. Where you are trying to go is clear, but the execution is sloppy. Consider instead:

"The governments of Han China and Maurya India share similar bureaucratic structures but differences in local philosophy gave them each a distinct character."

Do you see how this is much clearer? First, the specific subject is included, "The governments of Han China and Maurya India" no one has to ponder who "the two states" are even for a micro second. Second it clearly declares that Han China and Maurya India share basic organizational structures "share similar bureaucratic structures". First one, maybe two, paragraphs right there explaining what those shared structures were. Begin the second one with a simple comparative transition such as "The government of Maurya India was organized in a similar fashion." Third, their local philosophies were different "differences in local philosophy." Two or more paragraphs describing each major local philosophy right there. Last, the philosophies manifested strongly in governmental practices "gave them each a distinct character." At least one paragraph per state describing the manifestations of their principles. Viola, tight 8 paragraph essay right there with the framework to go longer if needed.

Your thesis should be bold and declarative. This is an argument you are making! You are right and you are about to prove it!

As for content, do some reading and take notes. If you're really struggling write your thesis bullets as an outline and fill them in as your notes. For example:

1 Han China was a bureaucratic government (strong statement! fill in under it with why it can be considered a bureaucratic government.)

a. Ministers were responsible for managing people on land they didn't own (I'm making these examples up. Find actual examples.)

b. The government established regulatory bodies beyond the king.

2 Maurya India was a powerful regional military

a. They kept 100,000 men under arms

b. They used their military to conquer one of their neighbors and secure power in the region.

Once you are done you should have several pages of notes describing each state and its operations. Then it's just a matter of comparing those bullet points in your essay. Want to argue that Han China was expansionist? Start one of your paragraphs with "Han China was an expansionist state" then give some of the examples from your notes. If you want to say Maurya India was similar you just say so "Maurya India was also an expansionist state" and give some examples.

Once your complete argument is there add a conclusion restating your thesis is some way and highlighting the most important points supporting it. Make sure to include some transitions between your paragraphs to improve flow. For example "because Confucianism advocated conquest Han China took over their neighbors." Just make sure that what you're saying is true. Did any of the leaders of Han China read Confucius? Did they advocate any of his ideas? Make sure your foot notes and bibliography are formatted the way your prof wants and you're good to go. Basic argumentative essay complete.

Lastly, don't quote me in your essay. Google reads reddit comments.

Hope that helps you organize your thoughts.