I've been reading the Count of Monte Cristo, which is set in 19th century France and Italy, and features a few duels. So, I guess I'm mostly wondering, what were they like in real life? Is the image in my head from books and movies likely to be wrong?
Hello, I've actually written a few pieces in the past on dueling from this era. While they might not fully answer your question, these might be of interest to you.
Reading a biography of Otto von Bismarck I've got the impression that dueling was rather common (in Prussia at least) amongst university students in 19th century, to the point where there were actually dueling societies. The book (Bismarck: A Life by Jonathon Steinberg) doesn't really dwell on the subject but it does relate how Bismarck got into a society by insulting and dueling a number of its prominent members. These duels were not to the death but slicing bits off people is definitely mentioned. One of Bismarck's opponents left without his moustache or most of his top lip.