I study Nazism and Nazi occupation policy. Although the Holocaust is not a specific focus of my research, it comes up - a lot. I never get depressed about the topic.

Now grant applications, submission deadlines, my students complaining about having to read too much (I once had a student complain about having to read the syllabus: "Its like 12 pages, you expect me to read that whole thing?!?") ... Those things depress me much more often.

For what it's worth, I experienced a major depressive episode in the spring of my junior year. I majored in American history, specifically Southern history, and at the time I was taking two classes (and working on a major project) that directly involved slavery and white supremacy. At the same time, I was dealing with a digestive disorder that kept me from eating solid food during flare-ups. These factors combined with simple overwork and lack of sleep to nearly shatter my nerves. It came to a head at a department ceremony; I ran into a much-feared professor, barely managed to politely excuse myself, and went and hid in the bathroom.

Your feelings are normal. Don't be ashamed of them. History is, fundamentally, the study of people. No matter how long ago or how far away they lived, the subjects of the discipline were once living, breathing people very much like you and I. I think that it is ultimately far better to experience discomfort, shame, and even revulsion when reading of the horrors we have inflicted upon each other than it is to be completely numb to the sufferings of fellow human beings, or only caring about those who are contemporaneous to us in time and space.

Tombstone is a downer.

Historically, my interests are more or less contained between 1850 and 1950, in Asia but also in how the West interacted with and acted upon Asia and Asians in the West. If you ever want to feel like people were colossal jerks, that's a good period to read about. Its not war and famine so much as just being really awful to other humans.

The redeeming factor is that even in the face of xenophobia and hysteria among a bunch of people who didnt really have the full picture, there were always people who were trying to counteract those events. Even if the history books make it sound like everyone was in agreement, they werent. There was a lot of inter-racial cooperation happening in America during some of the harshest anti-immigration periods. Even in the immigration agency itself there were people pushing for reform. They failed, but they were trying. Same for things like the Opium Wars, the foreign concessions, and just about any other period that seems awful.

Not that i think history shows that humanity is inherently good. But some humans certainly are.

I wouldn't say depressed, but reading difficult topics like the Holocaust and Stalinist deportations (when whole ethnic groups were rounded up and exiled, with many dying) can be dreary at times. However after having read about these things for so long I've kind of acclimatized to them, and it really isn't as harrowing as it once was.

I study interactions of indigenous peoples with Europeans in the Americas. It can be immensely depressing at times, but the overall experience of the research makes it worthwhile.