There is a texture to the essential fabric of life that we too often discard, but its coarseness is commensurate with the warmth it offers. Perhaps you may be seeking an understanding of folk-life rather than history. There is often a profound disconnect in the field of historical study, that renders alien that which ought be familiar if not outright familial. The Welsh poet Iorwerth Peate laments this very estrangement:

The study of Folk Life is not something to be exploited for the purpose of private research. It is not an excuse for wasting hour of in hair-splitting and word-spinning about terminology - 'regional ethnology', 'social anthropology' and the like. Here I am reminded of the late W. N. P. Barbellion's outburst about the study of insects:

Prof. Poulton, a man of very considerable scientific attainments, being present [shouted] with a very raucous voice in a way that must have scared some of the timid, unassuming collectors of our country's butterflies and moths. Like a great powerful sheep-dog, he got up and barked, 'Mendelian characters' or 'Germ plasm', what time the obedient flock ran together and bleated a pitiful applause. I suppose having frequently heard these and similar phrases fall from the lips of the great man at these reunions, they have come to regard them as symbols of a ritual which they think it pious to accept without any question. So every time the Professor says 'Allelomorph' or some such phrase, they cross themselves and never venture to ask him what the hell it is all about.^^1

What, then, is folk-life study all about? When I read that a Welsh farmhouse;

...had a projecting additional room of 10 by 11 feet dimensions, 15 feet wide externally. Therefore, the total dimensions were 34 feet by 38 feet which related as 17M:19M or (2x5)M+5 † 2M:5M+(2x5 † 2)M, the changes being rung between base number 5 and its † 2,7^^2

I see only a 'symbol of a ritual' which I know in my bones as having nothing to do with the study of folk life; it is merely another cry of 'allelomorph'.^^3

I regard such hunger for tangibility as the heart of the study of folklore, and by extension folk-life. The intrinsic worthiness of such an undertaking is profoundly expressed by Emyr Estyn Evans in his Irish Folk Ways:

There is a great fascination in exploring the living past, but one cannot employ the strict methodology of the historical or natural sciences...However interesting we may find 'bygones' for their own sake - and most of us take a natural interest in the way our forefathers lived - there is need to know not only how these relics were made and used but also what beliefs were held about them. Wherever possible I have studied the techniques of making and using tools as well as their lore, and by assisting in the processes have learnt more than books can teach. There is a clear relationship between the ways in which men's basic needs are satisfied and the social organization. Nothing less than the whole of the past is needed to explain the present, and in this difficult task we cannot afford to neglect the unrecorded past. **The crafts of arable farming, of animal husbandry and the home industries have done more to shape our instincts and thoughts than the trampling of armies or the wranglings of kings which fill the documents from which history is written.**^^4

Nonetheless the subtle practice and custom of daily life can be tragically ephemeral in the face of cultural transitions: Time will covet some folklore so tenaciously it may as well be etched in granite, yet capriciously extinguish others leaving less than smoke or shadows no matter how fiercely a flame there once burned. When Evans published Irish Folk Ways in the spring of 1957, the Ireland he was describing was nearly gone and what survived was in steep decline. As Caoimhín Ó Danachair notes there was a palpable sense of an ancient tradition being lost:

At the end of the eighteenth century most of the people of Western Europe lived in very much the same way as their medieval ancestors, dwelling in the same kinds of houses, dressing in the same materials, eating the same food, practising the same crafts and thinking the same thoughts. This was particularly the case with rural populations not yet touched by the industrial and urban revolution already gaining strength. All of this has changed, and is still changing with increasing rate...^^5

This awareness would often shape the intentions of folk-life study...though for brevity's dear sake I won't delve further. Instead, if this all sounds strange yet wonderful, then the American Folklorist Richard Dorson's Folklore and Folklife,^^6 may serve as a truer introduction than any meagre effort of mine. If the groundwork methods of folklore collection appeal to you, the masterwork guide used by the Irish Folklore Commission is the Handbook of Irish Folklore,^^7 which has been lovingly digitized by the Comhairle Bhéaloideas Éireann. Finally, my esteemed colleague /u/itsallfolklore could assuredly provide some further guidance: And I myself have no doubt that an exploration into folk-life as a discipline would have some significance to your problem.

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As an addendum - please understand; despite my habitual citation of Irish sources, folklore or folk-life is no more bound by the arbitrary borders of nations than a story is bound by language. Indeed what study has been built in Ireland was stood upon Swedish bedrock. 'Folk-life' is lent from the Swedish folkliv, and in 1909 the terminology for folk-life research was formed during Svensk folklivsforskning lectures at the University of Lund.^^8 When the exhibition for Rural Culture in Ireland opened at the National Museum of Ireland in 1937, Éamon de Valera emphasized the recognition owed to Swedish scholars:^^9

I want... on behalf of the Commission and of the Government to thank our Swedish friends who have done so much to make the exhibition possible. They have inspired us by the work which they have done in their own country, and we hope that they are going to start a movement which will make the work in this country second to none.^^10

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^^1 ^(W. N. P. Barbellion. The Journal of a Disappointed Man. London, England: Chatto and Windus, 1931. pp. 110-111.)

^^2 ^(Marshall Jenkins. "Ground Rules of Welsh Houses". Folk Life: Volume Five, 1967. The Society for Folk Life Studies. p. 75.)

^^3 ^(Iorwerth Peate. "Some Thoughts of the Study of Folk Life". Folk and Farm: Essays in Honour of A. T. Lucas. ed. Caoimhín Ó Danachair. Dublin, Ireland: Royal Society of Antiquaries, 1976. pp. 229.)

^^4 ^(Emyr Estyn Evans. Irish Folk Ways. London, England: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1979. pp. viii-xiv. Note: The emphasis in this excerpt is mine.)

^^5 ^(Caoimhín Ó Danachair. Irish Folk Tradition. Unpublished Manuscript: Presented to the Department of Folklore by Donal Ó Danachair, April 2014. p. 5.)

^^6 ^(Richard Dorson. Folklore and Folklife: An Introduction. Chicago, Illinois: University of Chicago Press, 1972.)

^^7 ^(Seán O Súilleabháin. A Handbook of Irish Folklore. Detroit, Michigan:Singing Tree Press, 1963.)

^^8 ^(Leonard Norman Primiano. "Folk-life." in Folklore: An Encyclopedia of Beliefs, Customs, Tales, Music, and Art. ed. Thomas Green. Santa Barbara, Calif: ABC-CLIO, 1997. pp. 323-324)

^^9 ^(Many deserving mentions, of particular note Åke Campbell and the great Carl Wilhelm von Sydow, both of whom were major influences on the study of folklore in Ireland; though today Professor von Sydow would likely be better known know as the father of the actor Carl "Max" von Sydow. Also the Swedish scholar Bo Almqvist later would become the director of the National Folklore Collection, as well a venerated professor of Irish folklore at University College Dublin.)

^^10 ^(Unknown Author. "Modern Research Exhibition." Irish Times, 27 May 1937.)

If you really want to understand history, understand that we will never know how people "really" (the worst word in all of history) lived in the past.

All we have are arguments and sources, and these sources AND arguments change over time. Sources come in and out of existence. Frameworks for arguments change because we are never actually arguing about the past when we talk about the past. We're "really" arguing about the present, using the past as precedent. And as the present changes, so too will our arguments and our understandings.

Consider the template of questions asked in this forum. I've personally categorized them into two formats: "is the past the same as the present?" or "is the past different from the present?" Once again, these are not questions about the past, they're questions about understanding the present through the past.

Also consider how hard it is to understand the current world you live in, with all the source and argument availability you have in front of you. Now take that same difficulty, project it into the past, and subtract sources, memory, and ways of understanding.

So, understand that you will never understand "everything." You will just at best be able to "argue an understanding" of a small segment of the past.

But that's fine, because like all things in life, it's the journey of understanding that is far more rewarding than the end goal of "understanding" (which arguably, does not exist).

I love this question. Asking it is somehow as difficult as answering it, because you're looking for some sensation more or less outside of language, right?

The reply from /u/Bealoideas is just monumentally well worded, insightful and inspiring. I have never really delved into the literature of folklore/folklife studies specifically, but this post has definitely spurred me to get more intimate with this field as soon as possible. Without comparison to that reply, I'll mention two disciplines that I feel engage with this difficult question you raise.

Firstly - The pursuit of experimental archaeology, which is a fairly recent discipline (I am neither a historian or archeologist so forgive the generalisations), that I think strives to comprehend the feeling of 'being in the world' such as humans of the past would have perhaps felt it. /u/kookingpot touches on this when he mentions historical reenactment, the act of reliving the past based on the best of our knowledge. I understand experimental archeology as the academic result of acknowledging the difference between what it is to know and to understand. We can understand any amount of historical fact (ex. stonehenge was erected using only manpower etc.), but we can only know it, if we live it ourselves. I believe the practice was more or less begun at the Danish experimental centre of Lejre, although experimental practice has been used both before and elsewhere, such as the Overton Down in Wiltshire, England. The method stresses the value of doing, that in order to know a medieval tapestry we must do more than apply an art historians gaze to it. We have to put in the months of work, sitting in front of the loom, feeling our back ache, in order to know the significance of the tapestry to its contemporary audience. I don't know if any 'findings' of experimental archeology has contributed greatly to archaeological literature, but I would perhaps imagine not, precisely because we are in the realm of experiential knowledge, which is damn near impossible to translate into words. This in my opinion is exactly what makes it so valuable and charming.

But speaking of words leads me to the second discipline; fiction, mostly in the form of litterature. Whether we choose to understand fiction as 'only' an aesthetic pursuit or otherwise, it remains clear that in the meeting with historical fiction we gain insight into the culture portrayed in a way that the academic disciplines simply cannot. Here I am not so much referring to 'period' writing, wherein, for example, a 20th century writer imagines a medieval narratives based on his knowledge of primary sources. I am more concerned with the qualities we find in literature of the past, and it's ability to sometimes snap us into a shocking recognition of former lifestyles. I have come to understand fiction as a form of mediation of information that relies on characters that the reader can relate to and emote with in order to engage personally with the information conveyed. There are certain things, certain facts, that simply cannot be communicated through fact, but only through fiction, exactly because we need to be able to emote with them. Your questions, I feel, are of this line. How did Hitler iron his clothes? We can easily understand how he did so, but we can perhaps only know it if an artist successfully renders it in front of us. When done right, art expands our cognitive abilities, it is very much a learning tool.

This connection with the past afforded to us by literature does not always reveal itself. Oftentimes, the language and styles used then are to remote from us, rendering the average user unable to penetrate into the mediation of information that is actually going on there. But it does happen that flashes of art sometimes seem almost uncannily contemporary, and relevant, as if you were listening to a friend speak about his day. In book six of the Iliad, Hector is on the battlements of Troy before the siege, when his wife Andromache brings their infant son Astyanax to wish him good fortune. Astyanax is frightened by the large plume of hectors helmet and starts crying. Hector removes the helmet and kisses his son. This level of writerly observation for this time is endlessly engaging. An infant is scared by something he doesn't understand, the parent comforts him. This scene is similar to any million of circumstances that could take place in a family today, we know it.

To relive a time a thousand or so years ago, we can read the following mindblowing passage from the Icelandic Grettir's Saga; *“Days before St. John’s eve, Thorbjörn rode his horse to Bjarg. He had a helmet on his head, a sword in his belt, and a lance in his hand, with a very wide blade. At daybreak it rained. Among Atli’s serfs, some were reaping hay; others had gone fishing to the North, to Hornstrandir. Atli was in his house, with few other people. Thorbjörn arrived around midday. Alone, he rode to the door. It was closed and there was no one outside. Thorbjörn knocked and hid behind the house so as not to be seen from the door. The servants heard the knock and a woman went to open the door. Thorbjörn saw her but did not let himself be seen, because he had another purpose. The woman returned to the chamber. Atli asked who was outside. She said she had seen no one and as they were speaking of it, Thorbjörn pounded forcefully.”

“Then Atli said: ‘Someone is looking for me and bringing a message that must be very urgent’. He opened the door and looked out: there was no one. By now it was raining very hard, so Atli did not go out; with a hand on the doorframe, he looked all around. At that moment, Thorbjörn jumped out and with both hands thrust the lance into the middle of his body.”

“As he took the blow, Atli said: ‘The blades they use now are so wide’. Then he fell face down on the threshold. The women came out and found him dead. From his horse, Thorbjörn shouted that he was the killer and returned home.”*

Atli is telling us that he has intimate knowledge of spearpoints. He has seen them being made, he has used them. He is telling us that even back then, times were changing. He himself used narrower blades than the one now sticking through his body. He probably has an opinion on which blade is best for a specific purpose. He dies not with a heroes soliloquy but with an everyman's comment. So I feel that I know him, what his character was like, how he might have understood his circumstances and surroundings.

In short, I have two unremarkable suggestions for you. firstly, Go fishing in the woods with an ice chest, it will take you a few hours to get over the fact that this is a stupid thing to do in todays age. But perhaps, after a while, maybe some weeks, you will begin to know what it was like for your grandfather. I actually don't believe this to be an exaggeration.

Secondly, read as much historical fiction, and primary sources, as you can find. It's a never-ending pleasure.

It sounds to me like you are trying to understand experiences and lifeways of the past. These are quite difficult to understand sometimes, especially since the only real way to do so is to actually live that way for a bit. But luckily, there are a couple ways to do so without inconveniencing yourself unduly.

Museums are a fantastic place where tools and objects that people used in the past are kept and maintained and studied. Some of the best museums at educating people have an interactive component, a place where people can either interact with artifacts or see them in contexts that help to inform.

The other way is to view reenactments. There are a couple places where museums or historical societies hire people to reenact daily life in a certain time period. Again, sometimes it's just the interactive room at the museum, where you can watch someone performing a task with old tools. Other times it's a whole attraction. For example, take Old Sturbridge Village, a recreation of a New England town in the 1830s, complete with actors going about daily life, crafts, and other methods. Another similar park attraction is Historic Jamestown, a recreation and reenactment of daily life in the Jamestown colony of Virginia, the first permanent English colony in the States. These types of recreations even occur outside the US, such as Nazareth Village, a recreation of a first-century Jewish village in Roman-ruled Israel, complete with farming, carpentry, and buildings.

Lifeways are a difficult thing to comprehend in many ways, and it all depends on the person attempting the comprehension. And remember, not all the information we have to reconstruct these lifeways is fully accurate (all sources are biased to one degree or another, and sometimes there are artifacts we don't know much about that make reconstruction difficult).

At least, those are the best ways I can think of to get the firsthand experience that I think would help you.