I would like a book that has the following traits:
If you have any recommendations I would appreciate it. Thanks!
What you appear to be asking for is a synthetic historic survey covering multiple disciplines. "Cavemen" for example, are probably better studied by archaeologists or anthropologists.
This also crosses time period boarders in that you want something working on ancient history, post-Classical history, early modern history, and modern history. Which, needless to say, is rather difficult for any one historian in the field to manage. And, you want it to reject feminist and Marxist history, which have been rather impactful on well pretty much every period of history studied.
The only one I can think of that might be close is Norman Davies Europe: A History, since it traces Europe from pre-history to the fall of the Soviet Union, although I have no idea if it satisfies the ideological specifications you seem to have.
Other good histories of Europe include:
Post-War, by Tony Judt who is a social democrat, a liberal, and rather dislikes feminism and identity politics, but, as the name suggests, is concerned with 1945 and after.
Eric Hobsbawm four Ages works which cover 1789 to 1991 from a broadly Marxist perspective. He's also done a lot of work in social and medieval history (particularly I know him for the invention of tradition).
The Birth of the Modern World might also be interesting. It is a global history tracking the time period from 1780–1914 rather than a European history, but it does focus on Europe a lot and can introduce you to the issue of global divergence. If mem serves, Kenneth Pommeraz wrote a positive review of the book.
By the by, historians normally engage in a practice called periodization, where they break up history into different time sections, either because of tradition or because these periods provide good analytical tools. Hobsbawm proposed the periodization of the "long nineteenth century" (from 1789 to 1914) and so many works after him use this period, seeing this time when the various processes that would make the modern world began to develop, accelerate, or take shape. You have other periodizations as well (the general crisis of the 17th century, for example, the short twentieth century, the early modern period, etc.). I generally find it much more useful to find works that deal with a particular period, rather than to try a work that spans multiple periods. You might be better served by finding a good book on the classical period, a good book on the medieval period, a good book on the early modern period, and a good book on the modern one. But, I cannot think that there would be many works that would be able to be good and not engage with feminist or Marxist critique.