In the aftermath of the War of the Triple Alliance, Paraguay had lost around half of its population with four women for every one man. To any reader, this would be a steep demographic discrepancy. After the war, an image of Paraguay as a país de las mujeres ("The Women's Country" or "Country of Women") was established throughout the world with observers noting how women took on both feminine and masculine roles in society (with one German observer going as far as to claim that it "seems that they feel more secure in their role as men"), and that women did all they could to keep a man. These are exaggerations, but there is some truth to the initial observation that women did take roles that to a foreign observer would seem traditionally masculine. However, in the Paraguayan context, they weren't traditionally masculind and actually originated in the pre-war society.

As historian Barbara Potthast points out, the pre-war social structures in Paraguay already contained an imbalance in the gender demographic. In fact, Potthast argues, this was something that was common in urban South America and that then, as today, many women took on the role as sole provider for the family. Furthermore, many women moved to the city due to the Paraguayan army; soldiers needed women to cook food for them and to do domestic work. Therefore, young women accompanied not only husbands but brothers, fathers, uncles and other male relatives from the countryside into the cities. Many thought city life was better than returning back home at the end of the soldier's service and remained where they were. Since Paraguay at this period was highly militarized, the effect that this could have had on urban demographics is clear to see. This also had an effect on rural demographics since men who left as soldiers didn't return for many years, even decades, despite having wives, fiancés and girlfriends remaining behind in villages or towns. Another factor that took men away from women and to places far, far away were yerbateros, labourers who were sent to pick yerba mate, a plant used as a basis for the mate drink. Men were sent to the inaccessible far north where they might never return from or they might make the choice not to return to their home villages after the working season.

This made it possible for many households to have a woman as the head of the family. In many families, before and after the war, it was a woman who had the most important economic and emotional role. With so many men elsewhere, many women worked the farms or sold wares at market places. After the war, women simply filled the vacant places that men had left, performing jobs that they were already doing in pre-war Paraguayan society. In conclusion, it needs to be said that Paraguay did not become a matriarchal society. Although women played a vital role in family structure, Paraguayan women did not conceptualize this into a political role for women. Instead, public political life remained dominated by men.

So, what about dating? It's not difficult to see a continuation of pre-war Paraguayan society in this regard. Back then, there were less men than women. After the war, this was still the case. Women were still commonly the head of the family and births out of wedlock were a common occurrence, something that was also the case in the pre-war society. It's fair to remember that not all men died in the War of the Triple Alliance and that the surviving soldiers did return home and found partners. Furthermore, immigration to Paraguay in the last decades of the 19th century also contributed to the increase of men. Yet there was an additional factor that needs to be taken in consideration. Potthast refers to the fact that few scholars have given attention to the forces of occupation that occupied parts of Paraguay for 9 years. Ironically, while Paraguayans today speak of the horrors of this late 19th century occupation, it was the consensual relationships between Paraguayan women and soldiers from the occupation forces that repopulated Paraguay in the immediate aftermath of the war.

This remains an understudied area and there is much more to be said. The leading expert in this is German historian Barbara Potthast who has done some amazing work in the role of Paraguayan women in the late 19th century, but there are many perspectives and subjects still waiting to be researched by current and future scholars.

Source:

Hogares dirigidos por mujeres e hijos naturales: Familia y estructuras domésticas en el Paraguay del siglo XIX by Barbara Potthast in Formas familiares, procesos históricos y cambio social en América Latina, ed. Ricardo Cicerchia (1998).