Why won’t you just acknowledge the Gods, like a good Athenian citizen should?

Who would you consider your best student, and why is it Xenophon?

When the stoners from California picked you up for a most excellent adventure through time and you met numerous rather famous characters throughout history what were your impressions of George Carlin?

Tell us of Xenophon! Are his writings of you accurate? Or as you and he talked often, might his friendship and respect for you color his words more brightly than was strictly true?

A follow-up if I may, did you ever enjoy a play of Aristophanes?

Are you real, or did Plato just make you up?

You say that we should all get buff once in our lives. What do you lift?

In my city and indeed in many others, or so I am told, many men and more recently not a few women purport to teach the law through this method: after having accepted a great deal of payment (so much so that young students impoverish themselves and incur enormous debts in expectation of the towering wealth they will later accrue once learned in the law) they instruct their students to read many scrolls containing the decisions of judges (also purchased at great price, I might add), then having assembled the students around them, call out questions concerning those decisions which the students then attempt to answer.

From this process of question and answer, the students are expected to derive the principles underlying the law, though if truth be told many of these teachers do interject their own opinions from time to time. Nonetheless, the teachers generally maintain (I will not say uniformly for they are a disputatious lot, especially among themselves) that the knowledge to be imparted comes from the students' answers to the questions. Indeed, it is generally held that one such school excels against another chiefly because of the quality of the students that it attracts and not the teachers.

It sometimes happens that the teacher will call upon a particular student to provide an answer, and if it is found, perhaps through the particular qualities of the response or even a direct admission, that the student did not read the assigned scroll (we need not tarry upon the reasons but I assure you it occurs), the teacher will express displeasure and accuse the student of wasting the time of entire group, and indeed this seems a just accusation.

I myself attended such a school and cannot make much complaint, for I have repaid my debts and make a tidy living preparing arguments for the courts (though in fact the vast majority of the disputes for which I am engaged are resolved through agreement, for the sober people know that juries are fickle).

But I bring this teaching method to your attention for this reason: when I asked my teacher why the law was taught in this way and not in some other, such as the teacher simply explaining the principles or the students reading the scrolls and then being examined on their conclusions. In response, I was told that you yourself taught by this method.

This surprised me, for I had never heard that you told anyone to read anything preliminary to asking questions (of which I understand you are fond) or relied upon someone having conducted such preliminary reading. And I also wondered whether you thought this method of asking questions and answering them was suited to imparting a body of technical knowledge or doctrine, for it seems to me that this is an honest description of the law.

I would also be edified if you confirmed that you yourself never accepted payment for your teaching, for I have heard rumors to the contrary from u/AristophanesOfAthens.

How's it going with Xanthippe?

What’s with all the questions?

Oh no-no-no, not asking YOU anything! I know how THAT dialogue will go!

Are you of the opinion that the gods constitute many divisions and various personages, old frail, young, man, woman, and that the stories of their activities are to be taken as true?

Tell me, O Sokrates, of Delion, if you would. Is it true that you stood like a boar before the baying hunting hounds, while other men, both the noble and base alike, fled from the Boiotians? What caused such a disaster? Did that day linger in your memory?

What does hemlock taste like?

Your friend Phaedo retold us your final hours before your death. He told us that you said that the life of a philosopher is one of rejection of bodily pleasures, a real philosopher lives so that others call him almost dead. How do you reconcile these statements with the reports of your revelling and ability to hold your drink? Surely regular participation in symposia runs contrary to an ascetic life.

Were you as widely respected before your students started doing public relations work for you?

Sokrates, what can you tell me of the movement of celestial bodies?

Hi, I am the Woman Fit To Guard (I wish!). Anyway, my question for you is how do I stop the degeneration of my soul. When I was in college, I was fond of gymnastic and curious about the world, not unlike your friend Glaucon, but I fear I have since become overly absorbed in my work and have an Oligarchic or Democratic soul instead of a Timocratic one. Advice would be appreciated.

Also, speaking of Timocracy, how much do you like the government of Sparta? The Laws describes a society a lot more like Sparta than like Athens.

P.S. I really appreciate your belief that reason is an inherent faculty of every human soul. In your dialogues, you express the belief that women and slaves can reason because they have human souls and I think that's amazing.

If the wisest person is the one that knows that he/she doesn't know, how can you learn something without becoming less wise?

I was asked by the famed naturalist, historian, politician, and commander Gaius Plinus Secundus, known as Pliny the Elder (an inhabitant of a city state in Italia, somwhere to the west of Greece and north of Sicily - someone with your knowledge obviously heard about it, but others might not have) to ask this question to a Greek, as they are apt to delight in questions like these.

As the dear Zeno of Elea has famously stated: Achilles, racing a tortoise, will never be able to win the race against this creature.

Now, the Roman Pliny called this an absurd question, but we can stipulate that neither you nor Zeno are fools. So any question aksed by Zeno can not be foolish. And therefore logic dictates that this question is not. How then can we show him the true meaning of Zeno's paradox?

I hate to be that guy but are you real?

Teacher, what do you think of your legacy? And as a follow up do you edit your own Wikipedia page?

How much of what Plato has written using your name is actually representative of your thinking as opposed to being his own ideas?

Sokrates, should I expect good things when the USA starts to elect independents? When you somewhat disturbed factions, worthwhile improvements came. When Cleisthenes also thwarted factions even more improvements were forthcoming.

Why did you disparage the more modern habit of reading and writing among the youth?

Who would win in a fight Hermes or Artemis?

Why does everyone always agree with you? Are they just being polite?

For the sake of a dubious polity,

why sever poetry from philosophy?

What are you doing on Askhistorians? If you're not dead you don't respect the 20 years rule!

You are known for your opposition for writing, yet you are on Reddit. How do you reconcile writing with Reddit?

Skeletons, why are they so into evil stuff and so on?

Were you fat?

How do you feel about kids these days?

Have you heard of Kangaroos?

The great Sophocles died for some years ago, as did the less great Euripides. Among the attic tragedians, the greatest seem to be all dead! My friends tell me the good tragedians no longer are alive, but a wise man like you would know for whom we should look.

Tell me, Socrates, who is the greatest tragedian alive? Who in Athens show us best how the world truly is?

What it do tho?

Does beauty lead to wisdom?

How are you my young friend?

Speak of Atlantis my friend.

Mr Sokrates It is said that you are the wisest of them all within the city of Athens, do you encourage citizens to take part in politics? And also does your Himation feels itchy?

How's your wife?

I have a triangle. It is not a 'perfect' triangle, but a triangle nonetheless. I'm happy with my imperfect triangle (not an ideal one, obviously), yet I feel like it could be more? Can you please advise?

How was life in Alopeke? Living in the countryside must surely be a nice experience compared to crowded Athens

Why?

Have you ever considered writing a book?

What is the Good Socrates?

If it were given to man to see the heavenly beauty face to face, would you call his an unenviable life, whose eyes had been opened to the vision, and who had gazed upon it in true contemplation until it had become his own forever? Also have you read St John of the Cross?

Do you think your method of persistent questioning may unintentionally make people less interested in pursuing knowledge? I worry that they become so angry and annoyed that they have no desire pursue knowledge, and so knowledge is diminished rather than expanded

Do you believe in proper grooming? Or, rather; master Sokrates, what is proper grooming?

Is it true that you have secret esoteric teachings? I've been told that they somewhat resemble Pythagorean spiritual teachings.

To what extent has your thought, or the thought of others like Pythagoras, been influenced by the teachings of the Egyptians?

Do you belive that either you, or someone else, will one day be able to gather, and understand all the knowledge that exist on this plane of existence? (And please correct me if I'm wrong, for I belive I once read that you and/or Plato belive in a world/truth beyond this one that we will never truly be able to reach)

What was your best day? Your most fulfilling day?

How does one persuade those devoted to hatred and injustice, to turn toward love and justice?

I am planning to include a character heavily inspired by you in an upcoming story of mine (I hope you don't mind!)

I'm curious if you have any thoughts or advice about portraying Sokrates in fiction? And/or, what would be the (borrowing phrasing from a contemporary) "Platonic Ideal" of Sokrates?

What is virtue? Can it be taught?

Sokrates, since you are such a wise man, and I am so ignorant, please tell me: what is the meaning of justice? What about piety?

Who would win in an arm wrestling contest, you or Thrasymachus?

What report do you give of the threshold of old age.

I should be asking the gods to place a curse worse than that of the house of Atreus on your name Socrates,for having to study both The Republic and Protagoras for my finals!But seriously can you explain to me what is the Form of the Good?I still can’t understand it.Also why do you criticize sophists so much since you have some things in common with them?and why the hate on poetry?

There is a plague spreading around in my city. The physicians all agree that it can be prevented by wearing a mask that covers my mouth and nose, to prevent inhaling the humours by which it spreads from one person to another, and so the assembly has passed a law requiring all citizens to do so, (and to cause their wives, children and slaves also to do so) in every public place.

What is more these physicians have devised a medicine they claim is proof against this illness, but it is very new and in my opinion it has not been proven to work. The Assembly, however has voted that every person who refuses this medicine is to be excluded from festivals and revels, lest they spread the illness to others!

Yet as a Free Man, a citizen and landowner, am I not entitled to soverienty over my own body, which belongs to me and not the state? Am I to be a prisoner in my own home only because I refuse the advice of the physicians who the Assembly holds in high regard though in my opinion they are fools? Must I truly walk the streets in a mask to please the majority just because they are not philosopers with the wisdom to distingish between truth and falsehood?

Why are you so difficult?

What does hemlock taste like?

Oh Sokrates, you are so great and wise that I believe only you can tell me what my question should be.

What meal would pair best with a nice dry cup of hemlock?