In season 4 episode 11 of The Simpsons Officer Wiggum says the above quote in response to a crime in progress.

On the surface this seems like a joke about how little help the description is and how inept the chief is at his job, however it's not entirely uncommon to see this description in old newspaper articles from the 19th century.

Special attention to people being without or losing their hats is also paid in articles about disasters ie. The Malbone street wreck and the Brooklyn Bridge Stampede, to the point that not having a hat or losing ones hat seemingly compounds the tragedy.

What is the source of this obsession with hats?! When did it start? Why did it end?